Updated: 12/25/2008 1:31 PM KSTP.com | Print Story
By: Tim Sherno

SHERNO: It's like your car catches a really bad cold...

An raspy, grinding, grating sound was coming from my car. From under my car.

Pulling into a parking space, turning the wheel, it got worse. "Rrrrrrr." "rrrrRRRRRrrrrr!!!"

"What the...?"

A massive snow-booger had developed in the wheel wells of my SUV. I know some people find that term objectionable, henceforth I will refer to them as 'SB's' instead.  And the SB pictured here is nothing. The SB clinging to my car was huge! The Grand, Royal, King-of-the-Road, Mother of all SB's.

The snow storm we had last week produced a bumper crop of SB's. Ugly crusty clots of dirty gritty snow.  The only thing good about them is that it's kind'a fun to get rid of them.  There have been occasions when my sons and I have kicked them off a row of cars at the grocery store parking lot.  Frankly, I don't know if you can cause damage by doing that.. I suppose I should have checked that out first.  Note to self.  

Our first snow of this season was just right. Just warm enough to melt road-snow into a gluey paste, and yet cold enough to quickly re-freeze it into an SB. Fast forward. I am in a parking lot looking at a colossal, mini-mountain of an gross grey SB with an unyielding grip on my car. True story: I could not get rid of it.  I kicked at the thing, first with my toe, then with the heal of my boot...nothing. Not even a chip. It must have taken 10 full-force kicks to dislodge it.  It's always satisfying when they break free. A triumph.

This winter there will be other days, many other days that SB's will crop up. Unsightly SB's that will hang down from your car until you do something about them.  Chances are you will have several, at least two, they tend to form in pairs. They make any car look bad, no matter what kind of car you drive. They draw the eye, not in a good way. If it's not a good mechanical idea to remove them, it is without question good esthetically. And if you see a friend with an unsightly SB dangling down from their wheel well, it is good etiquette to discreetly point out the offensive extrusion....

so that it may be removed.